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Why Sarah Palin Should Sponsor Coca-Cola

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Apparently, Coke explodes sperm. No joke. A scientist was even awarded the Ig Nobel Prize for the discovery. Apparently, the little guys soak up the sugary liquid, and become so filled with that they literally explode.

But don’t go dousing your genitals in the sticky stuff (the soda or otherwise) just yet, cuz apparently sperm swim much too quickly for the product to be used as an affective contraceptive. We’ll skip the other jokes about sticky substances and male/female fun parts we came up with…but it was fun spending our lunch thinking them up. OK here’s a couple of new slogans for Coke.

“Fizzy Enough to End the Human Race”

Really Enjoy.”

“Is that a bottle of Coke in your pocket? If so, let’s have sex.”

“Coke: Killing Teeth and Babies since 1886.”

Post your Coke slogans in our new and improved comments section!

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More:Jack White Vs. Coca-Cola

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