First, Eddie Scarry would like to congratulate Mediaite‘s Tommy Christopher for writing a column about race and politics that caught the attention of the hosts at FNC’s “The Five” on Friday, if for nothing else, the wrong reasons.

Second, Scarry would like to know why in self-referential-hell Christopher talks about himself in third person on a follow-up column he wrote about his mention on “The Five.”

Some examples:

On the heels of a column by Mediaite‘s Tommy Christopher questioning the racial sensitivity of a Mitt Romney campaign banner which read “Obama Isn’t Working,” a Fox News personality named Greg Gutfeld accused Mr. Christopher of being a racist…

When reached for comment on Gutfeld’s accusation, Mr. Christopher said…

Christopher also pointed out that his column didn’t “presume to know” what was in anyone’s head…

He added that…

…singling Christopher out…

For example, Christopher called…

Christopher says, with a laconic shrug…

I’d call this a type of dark “comedy” but then Christopher, who is the whitest man in D.C., would interpret that to mean I hate black comedians.