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Posts Tagged ‘Andy Borowitz’

Dennis Rodman’s North Korea Adventures About to Get a Whole Lot Weirder

Are you ready for a book about Kim Jong-un written by The Worm? How about a group of North Korean basketball athletes at the 2016 Summer Olympics, thanking Dennis Rodman via a translator for helping them to a series of unlikely hardwood upsets?

There are just two of the scenarios hinted at this morning by Dennis “I’m Not a Diplomat” Rodman at a New York City press conference following his second 2013 trip to North Korea. What’s perhaps most remarkable is that the expanding efforts of Rodman mirror the kind of goofy, jokey op-eds people used to write about the potential of U.S. basketball diplomacy:

Rodman says he will go back to North Korea in December to help select local players for two January exhibition games. He hopes to have stars such as former Chicago teammate Scottie Pippen and Karl Malone play.

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Fake New Yorker Item Fools Italian Magazine

Four strikes and he’s still not out. That is the frightening lesson to be gleaned from the latest example of an MSM outlet being duped by a satirical, fake Web news item.

On Monday, Andy Borowitz joke posted on The Borowitz Report that 76-year-old Italian billionaire Silvio Berlusconi was contemplating a run for some sort of New York City public office. On Tuesday, Italian time, the website for the man’s very own weekly Panorama news magazine ran with the item. As Rome-based freelancer Eric J. Lyman writes in The Hollywood Reporter, many warning signs were ignored:

The magazine did not appear to recognize the impossibility of the premise given that Berlusconi does not speak fluent English, is not a U.S. citizen and has never been a resident of New York – or that he is currently under indictment in four separate trials in Italy.

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Larry David Recalls the Day Mom Crushed His Journalistic Aspirations

Per a hilarious teaser clip for Current TV’s Friday evening broadcast premiere of Joy Behar’s Comics with Benefits, a Hurricane Sandy fundraiser held on Monday at the 92nd Street YMCA in New York City, Larry David‘s mom did more than curb her enthusiasm when the comedian expressed his young-age professional aspirations.

David recalled on stage with Behar how his journalistic aspirations were ridiculed by his no-nonsense mom. “I said, ‘Ma, I think I want to be a sports announcer when I grow up,’” David remembered. “She said, ‘What makes you think you… you?…. you!!! You’re going to be a sports announcer? Are you kidding? You’re not special.’”

Had mom not been so harsh, David probably would have wound up more on the color commentary side than play-by-play. In a perfect world, he would have found his way to the sad sack New York Mets.

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Barbara Demick Explains Why North Korea Forbids the Bible

LA Times Beijing bureau chief Barbara Demick (pictured) recently flew back to the west coast to speak to students at Brigham Young University. The author of the award-winning book Nothing to Envy, a look at the accumulated life experiences of six defectors, shared her uniquely informed perspective on the so-called Hermit Kingdom.

Demick’s talk is chronicled in a report today by BYU public relations major Michal Christine Savage. The country’s ban of all things Christian is well known. Perhaps not so celebrated is the underlying motive:

“In North Korea everyone is ranked by their loyalty to the regime,” Demick said. “How high your standard is is whether or not your family believes Kim Il Sung is a God-like figure. As you may know, there is no religion in North Korea, but they’ve plagiarized the Bible. If you read North Korean propaganda, Kim Il Sung is God and the son is Jesus. When he was born, there is a star that heralded his birth and then a rainbow. There is a reason they banded the Bible, its because they’ve plagiarized it.”

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The New Yorker Acquires The Borowitz Report

The New Yorker has acquired the satirical news site The Borowitz Report. The site, which is written by Andy Borowitz, is now housed at Newyorker.com. In announcing the move to the New Yorker, Borowitz says everything will stay the same, and that all topics are fair game, aside from one.

David Remnick, the editor of The New Yorker, has assured me that I can write whatever I want as long as I don’t make fun of Malcolm Gladwell,” explains Borowitz.

Borowitz’s first column is up this morning. It’s about Mitt Romney releasing the first picture of his running mate. The choice? Rich Uncle Pennybags, from the game Monopoly.

Huffpo/AOL Reaction: It’s About Freelancers

So far the reaction to the Huffington Post/AOL merger fall into a couple of different groups:

Anti-corporate reactionists: They don’t trust anything or anyone making money. They were already suspicious of Huffpo and then a giant corporation bought them. To anti-corporate reactionists the merger is just further proof for their already held beliefs. Their only news sources are alternative and if you’ve heard of it – it’s too mainstream. In a way they are happy about the Huffington Post AOL deal because it gives them fodder.

The Toldjas (sorry Nikki, it’s not copyrightable): As in “toldja Arianna only cared about her bank account” and “Toldja she was a Republican.” They are the “I never liked that site” people. They are the “It’s always been a digital tabloid” people. Yes, they’ve been waiting patiently on social networking sites for the opportunity to pronounce themselves as never liking anything so therefore they’re right about some things. Right-wingers also fall into this category. They’ve never liked Huffington Post and now take joy in saying “TOLDJA!”

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Alex McCord & Simon van Kempen Serve Up Some Tasty ‘Real Housewives’ Dish

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— DIANE CLEHANE

There’s never a dull moment on a Wednesday at Michael’s. When I arrived in the dining room today I spotted LX TV‘s senior executive producer Amy Rosenblum shooting a segment for tonight’s show with host Sarah Gore and Michael’s GM Steve Millington about their famous $36 Cobb Salad. Who says lunch here isn’t about the food?

I had a delightfully dishy lunch with Alex McCord, one of my favorite cast members from The Real Housewives of New York City, her husband Simon van Kempen and their literary agent, my pal Jason Allen Ashlock. The couple is surprisingly down to earth given the histrionics filled season. “We’re trying to prove you don’t have to be an idiot to be on reality television,” says Simon.

At the moment, Alex and Simon are in the middle of their book tour for Little Kids Big City, which is now in its second printing. It’s a well-written, ‘mom-oir’ (as Simon likes to call it) that chronicles their transformation from DINKY (dual income no kids yet) couple to hands-on, working parents of two sons, Francois and Johan. Also in the works are a “relationship book” written in the same ‘he said, she said’ style as Little Kids, a possible cookbook, and Alex tells me she’s penning a “roman a clef about the dark underbelly of reality television.” Watch out Jill Zarin!

I just had to ask Alex what she thought of Jill’s tearful performance at the marathon three-part reunion show, which culminated in Jill basically begging former BFF Bethenny Frankel for a hug. (I’m told the women shot for nine hours with very little down time.) “It was a long day,” says Alex. “I don’t know whether it was genuine or not.” But she didn’t hold back in describing Jill’s backstabbing behavior overall: “When you have nothing else in your life, you can sit around and scheme like a character in Dangerous Liaisons.”

The couple was first tapped by Bravo to appear on what was to be called Manhattan Moms in 2007 before it morphed into The Real Housewives of New York City. “We didn’t know we were going to be paired with bitchy, socialite wannabes,” says Simon. With three seasons behind them, Simon feels Alex “hit her stride” this year. For her part, Alex says her friendships with Ramona Singer, Sonja Morgan, and Bethenny have grown and she’s spoken to all three of them “within the last 48 hours.” No decision has been made about who will be returning next season but Simon says of the couple’s plans, “At this point, it would be silly to not do one more season.”

You can catch Alex at her next New York City book signing on July 6 at Barnes & Noble on Lexington and 86th Street with New Jersey Housewife Caroline Manzo, who be on hand to promote Bravo’s new tell-all on the popular franchise.

Here’s the rundown on today’s crowd:

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What’s the Matter with Augusta, Kansas?

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Andy Borowitz got it right. Kent Bush, columnist at the Augusta Gazette somehow manages to blame satire for his own shortcoming. Claims he’s happy he’s wrong but doesn’t admit what exactly he was wrong about.

Bush writes:

Joe DeSantis called me from Washington D.C. Wednesday morning and was obviously less than pleased with my inclusion of the fake quotes in my column.

I sent him the additional links where the story was indeed “going viral” and appearing on news sites and in news reports across the web and other formats.

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Huffington Post Has The Final Word On Susan Boyle

susanboyleheart.jpgThe other day this fishie got good and mad at our friend Ciaran for saying Susan Boyle had a face that frightens small children. She has a sweet, matronly face, we declared! Kids like that sort of thing! It’s harpies like Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan that the whippersnappers should be scared of.

So as soon as we saw the Huffington Post article by Andy Borowitz on Ms. Boyle, we sent it his way. It’s recommended reading for you, too. An excerpt:

Jenifer Genterson, a news anchor from Abilene, Texas, is just one of a chorus of beautiful TV talking heads who have been startled and inspired by the surprising presence of talent in an ugly person.

“In the TV business, we’re told that beauty is everything,” Ms. Genterson said. “But Susan Boyle has shown us that ugly people have the right to live, too.”

Andy Borowitz Tackles Cover Controversy

220px-AndyBorowitz.JPG Over at the Borowitz Report, comedian Andy Borowitz offers his insight into the uproar over the New Yorker cover:

Obama Releases List of Approved Jokes About Himself

Bid to Help Late Night Comics

Saying he is “sympathetic to late night comedians’ struggle to find jokes to make about me,” Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill) today issued a list of official campaign-approved Barack Obama jokes.

See unlike the New Yorker cover – Borowitz’s piece is making fun of Obama.