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Posts Tagged ‘Christmas’

How the Kmart Stole Christmas

KmartLayaway

Not so fast…

It’s actually not so hard out there for a retailer during the holidays.

Doorbusters; great sales; everyone rushing to get their children that last special gift to cram under the tree (if that’s your thing). It shouldn’t be a problem to spend some money — even if you have to use the luxury of layaway.

It’s a great invention that allows people to save up, use a store savings account, and buy those really big gifts. That is, unless the store decides to cancel layaway and then keep your cash.

Attention all Kmart shoppers: We have a serious issue. Read more

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Mariah Carey Wants Her Voice Back for Christmas

mariah-carey-christmas

Do you remember the time when Mariah Carey did that thing with her voice that threatened to permanently damage your dog’s hearing? No one really knew how she did it, but mutt owners everywhere felt the power of her vocal gymnastics.

The ghost of Christmas past just called, and its wants Carey’s ’90s starlet tones back.

If you were around a TV (or the Web went the dang thing went viral), you know that ghost spooked Carey and already stole the thing. During the annual tree lighting ceremony at 30 Rock last night, she was supposed to sing her classic Yuletide tune “All I Want for Christmas Is You“…

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TGI Friday’s Will Force Couples to Kiss with Mistletoe Drones

TGI Fridays Drone

Someone working for TGI Friday’s has been taking in too many science fiction movies. Either that, or stalking is no longer enough. or being a closet stalker just isn’t doing it for him, so it’s time to be a little daring. The proof in that Yorkshire pudding is found in Manchester, England.

TGI Friday’s is testing something that is certain to get people talking in the dining category…

Here’s the scene: you’re chowing on some cheese sticks and sipping an adult beverage when you hear this loud humming sound. It’s not that kind of party, so you ask your server what’s going on. She points up and there it is — a drone hovering overhead with a dangling twig of mistletoe just in time to creep you out during the holidays.

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APOCALYPSE WATCH: Black Friday Expands, Rebrands as ‘Black Week’

walmart-fights

Still wondering why we “can’t have nice things?” Two words: Black and Friday

It’s yet another unofficial American holiday during which people are allowed — nay, encouraged — to re-enact scenes from The Purge in hopes of scoring $400 off a big screen TV. The doors open, and may God have mercy on the soul of whoever is standing at that partition.

The stampede is on and the fights go viral faster than you can type #WalMartFights. However, if you think one day is enough of this madness, you better ask somebody. This year “Black Week” because it’s hard out there for a retailer.

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RadioShack Forced to Stay Closed on Thanksgiving After Employee Mutiny

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The formerly dominant personal technology super store, Radio Shack, is suffering in many ways.

This Dallas/Fort Worth-based company is laying off employees almost on a monthly basis. It is closing hundreds of stores annually. Its brand is considered so antiquated that self-deprecationwas in order for its last Super Bowl commercial. Now it is facing almost certain bankruptcy.

That said, there’s still hope: Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and all that they imply. Unfortunately, it seems that this business can’t quite get those right. Maybe that’s why they hired Weird Al: this story feels like a parody of how to get ready for the holidays.

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GOOD NEWS: Costco Continues to Be the Champion for Thanksgiving

war-on-thanksgiving

FOX News annually warns us of a “War on Christmas” in discussing the plight of religious connections to the holiday. Unfortunately, a “War on Thanksgiving” has commenced — and this one is about threats to the retail portion of the holiday.

The unofficial kickoff to Christmas shopping is a day marketed as a sales lollapalooza for some and an exercise in misery for many others. In fact, the blackness of Friday has crept into Thanksgiving, smearing its dankness all over shopping aisles everywhere. Lately, no one seems to care about eating turkey — but one huge retailer refuses to sell a thing on that day.

We say: good for you, Costco.

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Parisian Christmas Tree/Sex Toy Vandalized by Mystery Elves

paris christmas tree

Quick quiz: What in the Yuletide halls is this?!

No, it’s not a unique pawn in a really large game of chess or an oddly colored wine-bottle stopper for the world’s largest jug of fermented juice.

From The Atlantic’s CityLab, we learn this piece of contemporary something or other is a sculpture by the American artist Paul McCarthy called “Tree.” It’s supposed to serve as the centerpiece of the International Contemporary Art Fair (FIAC).

It also looks like a certain sex toy…and now it’s flat as a pancake. Bad PR for the global art community.

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THIS JUST IN: Scut Farkus of A Christmas Story Hates Bullies

THIS JUST IN 2Over the holidays, we all have traditions. Some are the banes of our existence and others we choose to embrace.

Many of us go to family get-togethers and use our Shazam app to discover who in the hell just came in the front door. Others fight over the turkey leg with that drunk Uncle Ed (we all have one of those). Several folk debate the genuine thought of procrastination that goes into a $25 gift card from Sears. And then there are folk like me who insist on joining TBS in the 24-hour-marathon of the greatness that is “A Christmas Story.”

You know, Scut Farkus? He’s the bully with yellow eyes … yellow eyes. So, help me God, yellow eyes! Whelp, aside from acting, his life is a paradox of his on-screen debut. And it’s kinda cool too.

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While You Were Out, UPS Sucked at Its Job

funny-ups-logoOver the holidays, you experienced the joy of Christmas. And during the festivities, you may have asked yourself several things:

1. How does a fat man slither down a chimney when I live an apartment?

2. Can I put my younger sister on Santa’s naughty list? You know, for a price?

3. Does NORAD track Santa by the heat output of Rudolph’s goofy red nose?

And possibly, the ubiquitous quizzer, “What in the red and green hell can Brown do for me?” Whelp, according to this story, not much.

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STUDY: Traditional Toys Still Rule on Christmas

christmasThe great American orator, Christmas legend and crime-fighting hero, John McClane of ‘Die Hard’ fame, once opined about technology, “As far as I’m concerned, progress peaked with frozen pizza.”

While non-Die-Hard-aficionados try to decipher the acronym in the picture provided here, you will note that many agree with Detective McClane. Even children. Wait, what?

According to this release posting from Digital Journal, and “three years’ worth of shopping data from Twenga, the UK’s most comprehensive retail search engine,” kids dig the Lego set and Lincoln Logs over something where batteries are not provided.

Yes, way.

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