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Posts Tagged ‘U.S. Postal Service’

More Lance Armstrong Fail: He Offered Rival $100,000 to Throw Race

lanceCalamitous falls from grace in sports are unfortunately commonplace.

There was Pete Rose’s gambling and A-Rod incessant whining, Tiger’s addictive philandering and Michael Vick’s dog killing, Aaron Hernandez murdering and Kobe Bryant’s alleged pillaging. It happens every year, as it seems.

These darlings of the media are given spotlight, fame and a truck load of cash for playing a game. So, of course, they start jonesin’ for more and think they are incapable of being caught doing no wrong. Such is life for these insipid athletes who need to spruce up their image by taking advantage of others.

And then there is the dingleberry in the roto-rooter of humanity, Lance effin’ Armstrong. (Technically, I think that is his legal middle name.) And wait until you hear this…

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U.S. Postal Service to Launch Clothing Line

Today in No, We Don’t Mean the Band News: The U.S. Postal Service, currently suffering from something of a PR crisis, just announced plans to develop its own clothing line with menswear maker Wahconah Group.

Before you ask, this is not a joke–here’s the press release to prove it.

The apparel and accessories line, designed to be “on the cutting edge of functional fashion”, will be called “Rain, Heat and Snow” in honor of the unofficial USPS motto: “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stay these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.”

It won’t just be the usual shirts, hats and footwear–it will include “wearable technology” like jackets with built-in iPod controls so mailmen can more effectively ignore the outside world while on their usual routes, controlling the free flow of information.

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