AllTwitter’s Wednesday series Twitticisms is back, featuring the jocular jests and witty wisecracks of Twitter’s funniest.
Cue the laugh track:
Praying for all those affected. pic.twitter.com/wOBDhUqmrL
— Nikki Glaser (@NikkiGlaser) September 8, 2013
Thanks, late night TV commercial, but calling someone for a free brochure is like traveling back in time twice.
— Josh Patten (@thejoshpatten) September 8, 2013
#TDSBreakingNews US only added 169,000 jobs in August. And 2/3 involved demonstrating, reporting on or videotaping "twerking."
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) September 8, 2013
if you have penciled-on eyebrows I can't hear a word you're saying because I'm staring at them
— Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah) September 7, 2013
Unless you win the lottery, there's no reason to celebrate anything with both arms above your head.
— Alex J. Mann (@alexjmann) September 7, 2013
Worried that the opening ceremonies for a Tokyo Olympics might not feature enough pomp or tentacled plushies.
— Henry Alford (@henryalford) September 8, 2013
Who do you follow for a laugh on Twitter?
(Laughing image from Shutterstock)