We spend a lot of time knocking people around for their dumb activities on Twitter. Today is different. Stand back everyone, we’re about to get positive. We’ve found that no one captures the spirit of this effed-up city better than Buzzfeed’s Washington Bureau Chief, John Stanton. Stanton spends his time tweeting about work, music and the shit he sees wandering around Washington, D.C.

For example, Friday morning, he spotted some lovebirds on his way to work and gave them advice. “Dear nasty couple with your tongues down each others throats on the metro: it’s too damn early and unsanitary for that trifflin nonsense.” See? That’s a true public service.

Stanton also live-tweeted the opening round of the NCAA tournament on Thursday evening. When Syracuse’s basketball team, long-time rival of hometown Georgetown, were playing, Stanton let his true feelings known about their head coach, Jim Boeheim. He tweeted, “If I could lock Jim Boeheim in a room with a syphilitic yak, I totally would.” Just think if we could do that with certain members of Congress! We might get something done every once in a while.

Stanton has travel tips for tourists. Read more