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Craigslist Fail Of The Week: This Has Got To Be A Joke

Fail RoadWe found this ad for an editor in Chicago and there are so many things wrong with it that we’re almost convinced it’s a joke.

No link, because it’ll be removed in about 30 seconds anyway after being flagged by thousands of angry freelance editors.

Here’s what the ad says:

I have written a draft text for a new website, and I need help proofreading, editing, polishing, or even rewriting it, so that it is grammatically correct and expresses my idea in a better way.

Women are preferred since it is a very womanly subject.

It has less than 12,000 words. I offer to pay $80 per project ($2 per 300 words rate based on original word count).

I need it done in a week (7 days) from the moment I send you the text. Pay goes down 10% for every day of delay, so if you can’t commit, do not email me.

If interested, please email me about your experience and examples of your writing.

If I get a lot of responses and cannot decide, I may ask you to proof read ” a trial page” for free and decide based on that.

Thank you for your interest.

Where to even start?

The sentence “it is a very womanly subject” is absolutely terrifying. What, have you written about menstruation or something?

The pay, just barely more than half a penny per word, is doubly terrifying.

And the threat of lowering pay 10% every day. Come on.

On second thought, this is too awful to be a joke. Sigh.

John Stossel On Age Discrimination: ‘We Slow Down As We Age, Maybe 25-Year-Olds Can Do It Better’

Is Fox News Channel reporter and commentator John Stossel just trying to annoy most of America? (We won’t answer that question—leaving it an exercise for the reader to decide.)

In this clip, he tackles age discrimination, saying that, well, maybe there shouldn’t be any laws protecting older workers. Maybe if you get fired for being old, it’s because you didn’t work as hard as a 25-year-old, so it’s your own fault.

Unrelatedly, last year when the Department of Labor reminded people that most unpaid internships were against the Fair Labor Standards Act, Stossel criticized the rules. He said on Fox News’s America Live, “I’ve built my career on unpaid interns, and the interns told me it was great—I learned more from you than I did in college.” (When asked why he didn’t pay them, if they were so valuable, he said he couldn’t afford it.)

At any rate, here’s the clip:

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

Meanwhile, The Referral Bonuses For Tech Startups Just Get Crazier

baconWe have posted before about bonuses for new hires at startups, which are just totally crazy, since these web 2.0, app, whatever you kids call it these days gewgaw companies are competing for very scarce talent.

Here’s a new one that has just gone off the rails (we say). Can’t there be one, just one media startup that has a hiring bonus this cool?

According to CNET, Scopely will give to any new hire (or any referrer of a new hire) the following: a year’s supply of Dos Equis, an oil painting of yourself, a tuxedo, Cuban cigars, beard grooming oil, a cologne called “Sex Panther,” and $11,000, wrapped in bacon.

The team has already made one hire through this ridiculous incentive program, an engineer named Mike Thomas. Another 899 have applied but been rejected. Congratulations, Mike.

The really crazy thing? Scopely is in “stealth mode,” raising money to do….nobody knows. All anyone outside the company knows is that it is “preparing to disrupt a segment of the social web that is ripe for innovation.”

Update 11/17/11: The Scopely folks sent us two enormous photos of what bacon-wrapped cash really looks like. We really, really want that bacon to be a clever plastic reproduction, but fairly sure that that’s actual greasy money.
Here’s one such photo. You can click it to get a huge (desktop wallpaper-sized?) version.

At Work, Do You Hug, Bro-Hug Or Handshake? The WSJ Is On The Case, Thank God!

Earlier this week, Wall Street Journal workplace columnist Sue Shellenbarger tackled an issue nobody was wondering about: whether you should shake hands, fist-bump, or otherwise greet people in your workplace.

The answer (surprise!) is: it varies depending on the company culture.

“Ashley M. Harris worked for a San Antonio, Texas, public-relations agency that was very ‘huggy,’ she says. ‘You would walk into a meeting and give your client a kiss on the cheek and a hug, saying, ‘How good to see you,’ while holding onto their arm,’ she says. ‘It took a lot for me personally to get used to the hugging.’

“But at a university where she later worked, she threw her arms around a former professor of hers, and ‘he literally did a step back’ and tensed, she says.”

In case it’s all too confusing, the article came with a clip-and-save guide to interacting with your coworkers, sorted by industry. As you can see, in “entertainment, media” an appropriate greeting would be a kiss or hug, while in manufacturing you still shake hands. If you work in PR and your coworker wins the Super Bowl office pool, you are permitted to give a bro-hug. Not sure how? The guide comes with an illustrated diagram.

What more can we say?

Was It Worth It? Journalist Wins ‘Best Scoop’ Award After…

the golden charm 1
A journalist working for Papua New Guinea’s Post-Courier has won an award for “best scoop” after he had to undergo a ritual circumcision to get the story, Britain’s The Telegraph reports.

Simon Eroro had to “cross rivers and jungles to reach a group of rebels, only to be told he must first agree to the circumcision as part of a cleansing ceremony.” He agreed, and wrote a story exposing the cross-border movements of rebels moving from Indonesia to Papua New Guinea. The report led to a police operation to tighten the borders.

The Post-Courier is owned by News Limited, Rupert Murdoch’s Australian arm, and Mr. Murdoch, attending the ceremony for the in-house award, said that that night, he had “witnessed many examples of great journalism.”

Eroro, for his part, thanked his editors for “trusting me and engaging me on that assignment.”

Journalists are rarely granted access to Papua and West Papua, the Telegraph reports, adding that “[s]ome of the rebels still closely observe traditional customs, including wearing penis gourds, with the sizes varying according to status.”

There’s Nothing Wrong With Applying For Jobs From Your iPhone, Unless……

Here’s a letter sent to a PR firm that is a lesson in what not to do:

I am a student from XXX State University I plan on graduating this spring and was very interested in applying at your firm. My major is public but I have had experience in advertisement, campaign management, and social media. I will of course sent you a portfolio and resume upon my graduation I just find it appropriate to contact you early. I extremely respect your business and I feel I have the ability to add to your already sterling reputation.
Thank You
Sent from my iPhone

The recipient of this email, Gil Rudawsky, said that it “shows laziness” to send a letter from an iPhone and that it’s the “ultimate insult.” Really? The genericness of the letter, the terrible spelling and grammar, and the lack of research weren’t insulting, but the fact that the student sends emails from his phone is an insult?

We’re gonna go out there and say that sending an email from your iPhone to apply for a job isn’t inherently bad. Hell, perhaps it will make you look even more interested (“I just saw this job posting and couldn’t wait to get to my computer to apply!”). This letter wouldn’t improve any by having been sent from a computer, we promise you that much.

One thing to keep in mind: Obviously, the Autocorrect features on iPhones and other smartphones do lend themselves to some hilarious typos. And it can be harder to proofread on such a small screen. Know your own limitations. If the emails you send to family are riddled with mistakes because your fingers can’t hit those tiny virtual keys, as ours often cannot, think twice about using the smartphone to apply for a job, obviously. But you could always draft an email (delete any addresses in the To: field to make sure you don’t accidentally send it) and save it for review later, or let a friend look over it.

Whoa Whoa Whoa: Marketing Firm Asks Bloggers To Insert Ad Links ‘Under The Radar’

Gawker writer Hamilton Nolan says that yesterday he was approached by a marketing firm and asked to insert links to clients into otherwise normal blog posts, for a “generous” payment.

The agency is called 43a (“It’s named after the apartment we started out of,” the emailer told Nolan), and they say they have “some of the biggest clients in the world.”

That said, this understandably seemed like a strange arrangement. Nolan dug deeper and received the following response:

We work with bloggers mainly. That’s not to say we don’t have editors working for us (we work with editors at the Huffington Post, Business Insider and Technorati — to name a few). We generally meet with resistance when dealing with editors, but bloggers aren’t paid as well and most are willing to make some extra money.

What we suggest (as long as you think it won’t get you into any trouble — we don’t want anything that isn’t beneficial for both parties) is trying to drop a link in the article, and seeing if the editor mentions it. If he does, remove the link, and we’ll go our separate ways. If he doesn’t, we’ll pay you handsomely, and we can continue if you want to. We don’t do this for every article, and there is a certain “under the radar” element to it, so you don’t want to over do it.

That said, I also don’t want you in trouble with your editor. So if it can’t be done, just let me know and we’re totally cool with that.

HuffPost, through a spokesperson, and Business Insider, through CEO Henry Blodget, denied the practice.

This is totally ridiculous. If true, it destroys, as Nolan says, “the fundamental (this is a corny and dramatic word, but accurate) sanctity of honest writing in exchange for money.” But it’s so ridiculous we wonder if somebody isn’t being punked. Who on earth would pay for this, and what writer would jeopardize their job by accepting money for ads under the table?

Blogger Buys Newspaper(?!)

You know what they say in journalism: when a dog bites a man, that’s not news. But when a blog buys a newspaper….Tom Knighton, owner of Albany, Ga.-based political blog Laws N’ Sausages, has formed a company to purchase community weekly The Albany Journal.

Local TV station WALB reports:

“Since Knighton was young, he has wanted to be a newspaper man.

“‘Being a journalist is just something I have always wanted to do, and when an opportunity like that drops in your lap, you do not turn it down,’ says Knighton.

“‘This paper has not been dying, this paper is not dying at all, it is doing very well, and it turns out there is a trend throughout the country for community papers,’ says Knighton.”

Knighton plans to add a book review section to the paper but won’t be changing “for the sake of change,” WALB reports.

As far as he (and we) know, this is the first time a blog has bought a newspaper.

The paper’s circulation is not tracked by the Audit Bureau of Circulations, nor would Knighton disclose how much he paid for the newspaper.

When On An Interview, Leave The Bling At Home

Diamond ring
Another sad-but-true piece of advice for jobseekers.
Apparently some jobseekers have damaged their chances for a job by wearing a big engagement ring, which some hiring managers and recruiters say could send the signal that “this person doesn’t need the job.”

In another instance, HuffPo writer Katherine Bindley says, a woman returning from maternity leave asked for a raise and was turned down because of the size of her engagement ring. (She’s now suing.)

“It’s obviously unfair,” Bindley says. “No one would ever ask a man how many carats the diamond ring he bought his wife is to determine what kind of job or salary he deserves — but the [evidence suggests] that it happens.”

We don’t have much more to add. If you’re judging applicants based on whether you decide they “need” the job or not, you’re already not doing a very good job at hiring. Because the flip side of the “this person doesn’t need the job” coin is “this person is completely desperate.” That doesn’t make them a good hire.

12 Things You Didn’t Know People Did On LinkedIn

Bozo and His PalsApparently LinkedIn, despite its reputation as a place for professionals to hang out, still attracts some world-class bozos.

On PRDaily, Jure Klepic describes some LinkedIn goofs that he’s personally witnessed.

Among them: asking for a date (really? is too hard for you?) and asking complete strangers for recommendations.

Another don’t: asking questions like the below in LinkedIn’s Q&A section (unless, of course, you’re doing some weird performance art project, which we haven’t ruled out)

Q: “I am divorcing my wife, and I own a C-class corporation. Would you tell me how to hide the corporation so that I don’t have to give that b**** half of it?”

Don’t lie on your profile, use a profile with chest hair showing, or buy contacts. Really, we think these misuses of LinkedIn are so obvious that nobody would actually do them! Or would they?